A team had been sent to the fallout shelter that could be their saving grace and while Marcus hoped that it would be a solution to their problem, he'd never been much of an optimist. He knew better than to put the survival of their people on the hope that an old bunker built long before his time would be up to par. And even if it was there was the matter of resources that would last them through the radiation. They were looking for other solutions as well and in the mean time there was still peace to be made and maintained between themselves and the other clans. If they were going to survive, they needed to last the next sixth months at the very least.
It hadn't been long since the city of light had fallen but Marcus couldn't help his mind drifting back to it in spite of what needed to be done. He needed to focus. It was difficult to when he was drawn back to it every time he closed his eyes, in his sleep- or what little of it he was getting. The pain lancing through him where he hung on that cross. Watching Abby place that gun against her own head. The blissful release of the chip. He'd felt nothing. No pain, no sympathy, no happiness or sorrow. He'd been numb and he'd enjoyed it, the escape. He could still remember it all. Fighting his own people, shooting to kill. There was no remorse, nothing whatsoever as he'd pursued a single-minded goal. Stop them. Forcing his way through their barricade. His hands around Bellamy's throat.
And when he'd been released from it, everything had hit him at once. Pain. Physical, mental. He'd let go of Bellamy but the realization of what he'd done suddenly registered. Guilt. An overwhelming amount of emotion, as though everything that the chip had blocked in the hours since he'd taken it was all flooding through him at once. He had taken the comfort Abby had provided without thought and pulled himself together because he'd had to. There were others struggling, reeling from the experience, and his people had needed him. He hadn't quite worked through all of it for himself yet. Ignoring it seemed to be the better option at present.
The latest return trip from Polis had left him weary, though he found himself exhausted more often than not these days. He'd not even had time to recover from his latest injuries after ALIE had been taken care of. But there are more important things to consider than aches and pains and he'd been working through it in spite of Abby's concerns. His wrists were healing but not quickly enough and he'd been tending to them himself for the most part, not wanting to worry her. Once again he found himself in the infirmary to change his bandages. He peeled off the dirty ones carefully and cleaned his wounds as he'd been instructed, jaw clenched through the pain.